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/li> 8 comments How long is too long? This is the question that troubles the conscientious guest. Julian Assange, the notably unconscientious founder of WikiLeaks, invited himself to stay at the Ecuadorian Embassy in Knightsbridge on June 19. It is now exactly a fortnight later, yet he shows no signs of moving. He is, by all accounts, an awkward sort of guest. In his book about Assange, his former second-in-command, Daniel Domscheit-Berg, lists many of his irritating characteristics, any of which might drive even the most pliable host up the wall. Julian Assange: Just how long does he plan to sleep in the Ecuadorian Embassy? Here are Julian Assange’s ten most annoying habits, with additional comments from Domscheit-Berg: 1.  He doesn’t say ‘hello’, he says ‘hoi’. 2.  He also likes to say: ‘How goes?’ 3.  He enjoys sliding down bannisters. 4.  He prefers to eat with his hands. ‘Julian often behaved as though he had been raised by wolves rather than by other human bei

/li> 3 comments The Killing, The Bridge, Sebastian Bergman, Wallander, The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo . . . For those who can’t keep up, here is my handy cut-out-and-keep A to Z of Scandinavian crime drama. A is for ANGST The inaccessible island of Angst, home to the reclusive, bearded Chemical Poisons billionaire philanthropist Ulrik Angst, is the annual setting for Angst family reunions. Sadly, their celebrations always end in tears, generally followed by a gunshot, an open window, footprints on the flowerbed and the naked corpse of an unknown woman in an upstairs bath. B is for BILLIONAIRES All billionaires in Scandinavian crime dramas are reclusive and sullen and live by themselves on far-flung islands that receive only one and a quarter hours’ sunlight every third year. Though their ex-wives, business associates, children and servants have all died in mysterious circumstances, for some reason the local Police Chief insists that they are beyond suspicion, and will a

/li> 0 shares 54 comments INJUSTICE: LIFE AND DEATH IN THE COURTROOMS OF AMERICA by Clive Stafford Smith Harvill Secker £18.99 ☎ £16.99 inc p&p Rating: Mission in life: Lawyer Clive Stafford Smith defends prisoners on Death Row Aged ten, Clive Stafford Smith saw a picture of Joan of Arc being burnt at the stake. He was particularly upset because he thought she looked like his sister Mary. Five years later, he discovered that what he had imagined to be a singularly cruel part of history was still happening in America: men and women were  being executed by society. Aged 19, full of the idealism of youth, he set off for  the States, vowing to put an end to the  death penalty. He managed to get himself a job with a lawyer in Georgia who was campaigning against capital punishment and spent his first season visiting prisoners on Death Row. ‘That summer my opposition to the death penalty slipped down from my brain and into my heart.’ Now aged 53, he has d

/li> 2 comments Continuing our handy, cut-out-and-keep A-Z to Scandinavian television crime series... Mission: In Dank Fog, the chief detective is assigned to investigate the murder of a naked man (posed by model) N is for NOTHING IS EVER QUITE WHAT IT SEEMS Alert television viewers have long realised that, in Scandinavian crime series, nothing is ever quite what it seems. For instance, in the 80-part series Dank Fog, the chief detective,  acting on a tip-off from the former boyfriend of a former girlfriend’s former boyfriend’s girlfriend, is assigned to investigate the murder of a naked man. But on closer investigation of the corpse, it turns out that Nothing Is Ever Quite What It Seems: the detective notices a zip down its spine and undoes it, only to discover that inside the skin of the naked man is the corpse of a naked woman. Twenty-five episodes later, the same detective revisits the corpse on a hunch, only to discover another zip on the spine. He pulls it, and

/li> 9 comments We apologise for this and for any future apologies. Our onboard dedicated customer service apology team will continue to deliver apologies at frequent intervals throughout the course of your journey with us today. These apologies are due to circumstances beyond our control. Customers requiring apologies in braille, please apply to your train manager. Please acquaint yourselves with the safety instructions situated in the head-rest opposite. Sorry! Our dedicated customer service apology team will continue to deliver apologies throughout the journey Customers are reminded that the consumption of safety instructions is a health hazard, so please do take care to ensure they are situated at a safe distance from all hot or cold snacks, available from our trolley service. Customers standing in Coaches A and B are advised that there is still a limited amount of further standing room available in the remaining coaches. On behalf of our onboard staff, thank y

/li> 0 shares 3 comments AMONG THE HOODS by Harriet Sergeant Faber £14.99 ☎ £11.99  inc p&p The cover is almost comically off-putting. A very soignee woman with meticulously coiffed hair and a shiny silk shirt looks out at the reader, arms crossed, with a self- confident, knowing air. Behind her, in the dark middle distance, lurk half-a-dozen hoodies, all hunched up, their faces shielded from view, and, behind them, a gloomy mass of grey tower blocks. It looks as if Penelope Keith has accidentally wandered on to the set of The Wire. And the book’s subtitle, My Years With A Teenage Gang, further adds to the impression that this is a book by Lady Bountiful about her afternoons spent popping across the river armed with a picnic hamper filled with nutritious scraps to throw to those simply darling little hoodies. Guns 'n' poses: Harriet Sergeant with two of the gang on a trip to the Imperial War Museum This impression is not, it must be said, wholly i

/li> 0 shares 0 comments TITIAN: HIS LIFE by Sheila Hale Harper Press £30 ☎ £24.99  inc p&p Rating: Sometimes, in the strange world of biography, an odd rule applies: the less that is known, the longer the book.  In a funny way, it is almost as if words were being employed to fill a vacuum. Sheila Hale’s new biography of the great 16th Century Venetian painter Titian is more than 800 pages long. It is scholarly, erudite, panoramic, endlessly inquisitive and as clear as can be. It successfully illuminates fascinating areas of European history, the rise of Protestantism, the clash of empires, the growth of Venice, the pursuit of beauty. Detail falls on detail, detail on detail. Early on, a couple of lovely pages tell you, for instance, where all the different pigments in Venice came from at that time: malachite from Hungary, earth colours from Siena, lapis lazuli from the mountainous caves of what is now Afghanistan, crimson from the tiny bodies of femal